USO Day One: Serious Business

The top laydeez opened their accounts in New York today in fairly crushing style. First up, Kim Clijsters destroyed Viktoriya Kutuzova 61 61, while Victoria Azarenka did the same thing to Warsaw champion Alexandra Dulgheru and Agnieszka Radwanska only allowed Patricia Mayr one more game. You’d think they were racing to be the first to knock someone out of the tournament, had not Anastasia Yakimova stolen the show by retiring after just three games, sending Vania King through to the second round.

Also in the mood for baked products? Marion Bartoli, singlehandedly ending Paraguay’s interest in the ladies’ singles by defeating Rosana de los Rios 61 60. Vera Zvonareva and Flavia Pennetta continued the identical scorelines trend of the day, beating Nuria Llagostera Vives and Edina Gallovits respectively 60 64.

Can’t decide whether I love or hate Vera’s outfit. The colours are a tad ‘shades of diarrhoea’ for my liking, perhaps. Anyhow, Momo (unsurprisingly) made almost the heaviest weather of the top ladies, giving away a whole seven games to Tatjana Malek.

That honour in the end must go to Samantha Stosur, who squeaked by wily veteran Ai Sugiyama 64 46 64. And looked good in her outfit, if not tennistically speaking.

All in all only one women’s seed fell today, that being Kaia ‘how am I still seeded’ Kanepi, who was knocked out by Taipei’s Kai-Chen Chang in three sets. Maria Kirilenko, Aleksandra Wozniack and Anna Chakvetadze both progressed, albeit with a slight hiccup in Chakvetadze’s case (dropping a set to Yurika Sema). And how about Sania Mirza, beating Olga Govortsova 62 36 63?

I live for the day when she and Querrey set up a tennis academy and the tour is populated by their freaky off-hand offspring.